Thursday, November 4, 2010

Story Time

Outside CVS today there were two bums. Mid-60's I would guess.

They looked like this...
Except the woman was wearing a once-ravishing purple coat... so it was more like this...

But she was old. And homeless. And dirty.

And the man was sporting a long, full braided beard. Much like this...

I am going to refer to them here forth as Ozzie & Harriet.

Harriet: Well, I am still married according to the law. The law screws us.
Ozzie: That don't matter to me.
Harriet: It should matter, they really do cause all sorts of problems for us.
Ozzie: No, I meant you being married don't matter to me.

I go inside, they had finished their cigs, so they were right behind me, going to the same section of the store.

Harriet: I like you. I really do. I am going to buy you something. Pick something out.

I then go about my shopping.

In line at the front I hear them behind me. A lot changed in 5 min.

Harriet (stern tone): Give me your money.
Ozzie: I don't have any.
Harriet: Then you are no good to me.

So, really a lot changed in 5 seconds.

They left the store separately.

It was a short, hot, love affair.


Ashley C said...

Best. Love Affair. Ever.

Michelle said...

Didn't I see that movie?