Oscars Academy Award Best Picture OpEd 2020

My thoughts below, yours in the comment section. 

Ford V. Ferrari 

It's fine? It's a sports movie, maybe? Maybe a movie about a nice guy who wins, also about America being the best? Hard to say what the messaging was. I wasn't impressed or unimpressed. I was not entertained. I think this is the Green Book of this year, its so bland that it becomes the defacto winner because no one will dislike it? Who knows/cares. 

The Irishman
I watched as much as I could. It was like a VERY long form vine clip about the mafia. Same looped storyline about how the mob worked... which is exactly how you think it works. Well acted. Mildly well written. Too boring. Which is different than being too long. I've watched over 300 hours of Grey's Anatomy and they have my attention still. Ok, bye. 

Jojo Rabbit
Thought I would appreciate the art of this, but dislike the movie. T'was the other way around. I liked it a lot, but wasn't as well crafted as I kept reading and hearing. It was good, my 2nd favorite. Not sure how they made Hilter a whimsical, acceptable punchline - well, I do know, they straight-up made fun of him and highlighted how idiots fell for him. Much like MAGA/KAGA idiots now. The movie is a parody. I'd be ok with this winning because I did like it and then it would reach more choir members to preach to. 

Joker
Didn't see because I hate watching gore. I like Joaquin. 

Little Women
It was nice. So dramatic. Though, a remake and nothing groundbreaking. And idk who edited it, but they didn't do their job well. 

Marriage Story
Disappointed myself for finishing this. It was impressive because it was so dialogue heavy and the leads both had strong performances. Other than that, it was not worth it. 

1917 
[Editor's note: this was listed here, in this order, which is supposedly 'alphabetical'. Ok, yes if it were titled "Nineteen seventeen" it would be in order, but as you should know: in text any number over ten should be numeric and under ten should be written out long form, so 1917 is correct... however, all numeric things go before "A" when sorting alphabetically, I know these things, the Academy doesn't. Also, this could be wrong because I'm too lazy to google, but I'm pretty sure].

1917 should win. It was a cinematography gift. Well job. Incredible story telling. Innovative. Delicate subject. A few years ago I said we shouldn't make war movies any more, but here we are. 

Once Upon A Time in Hollywood
I should have liked it more than I did. It was charming and full of beautiful people. Well acted. I like the gimmick of a movie with in a movie (though we didn't need to watch the whole feature). I often say whatever it is you've got, give people MORE. I guess I am not talking to Q. Tarantino, because this move reeked of him. I like salt on my food; this movie is over salted, warm buttered movie theater popcorn

Parasite
Did you see Gone Girl? Girl on a Train? A Simple Favor? This is that. Those are this. Interchangeable. You'll never be able to unconvince (not a word) me the only real reason this got the nod was because elites love to be pretentious with their subtitled foreign films. This is your basic psychological thriller with dark twisty turns and a dash of comedy. Don't come at me with "it had layers of international class warfare though!". So did Crazy Rich Asians and it wasn't nominated and I'd say it's on the same level. I liked both movies, they were enjoyable, but this and that aren't anything to hand an Oscar to. Shouldn't win. Might win. 

Now Give

My generous, thoughtful givers: I give to you my Gift Guide. I once said that Trump's America doesn't deserve my gift guide, followed by years of going dark... Thank goodness we're finally taking America back. 

Maybe you'll find something to give. Maybe you'll find the intro too political. Maybe you'll find peace on earth and good will towards men. 

Let's get to it, shall we. 

New York Times Custom Birthday Book

Bound front page of every birthday of your (their) life. It's obviously more valuable the older someone is. Comes across as "thoughtful" but you could give this to someone you don't know all that well at all. People love themselves.

 

NYT Custom Book//$100 for leatherette, $145 for linen

Crate and Barrel White Ruffle Earthenware

I can't take credit for the next one; my friends were getting married (Hi Peter + Shannon!), they registered for some of these pieces.  I really liked it and have bought it for a few others as housewarmings. The thing I've noticed is it is used: as a table decorative centerpiece in a few homes I have given it to, the platter for serving a variety of things. It is classic enough to integrate with a ton of differing styles, but interesting enough to be noticeable. Give one or the other, or a set...

16" Ruffle Platter ($30, center under bowl)//15" Large Ruffle Bowl ($30, top) //11" Small Ruffle Bowl ($25, center on top of platter)//5.5" Dip Ruffle Bowl ($8, bottom)

Movies/Whirly Pop
You all deserve better than microwave popcorn. There are a few ways to do this gift, but just do it. Sometimes you just need to spend a few dollars more for the prestige of having the gift arrive from a high end store, or wrapped in the high end store paper, or with the high end store gift receipt. If you don't need that, I will link you to the same product, just cheaper. You can also "bundle" this gift with say a Redbox gift card. This + movie rental card is an awesome family gift for your sibling with 25 children. (iTunes, Amazon Prime, Netflix, etc whatever platform they may use)

Whirly Pop from Bed, Bath, Beyond ($20)// WP from Williams Sonoma ($40 with popcorn kernels) // Amish Popcorn Gift Set ($30)

National Park T-Shirt

Who doesn't love Americas best idea? Get a little local with a T-shirt of their favorite.. or future favorite... place to be.

National Park Service Shirts ($10-18) - Zions, Rocky Mtn, Grand Canyon, Blue Ridge, and more! Also in long sleeve! 

Beyblades for the kids

Am I plugged into what the kids want? IDK, yeah. Well, these toys let them unplug (see what I did there?). You don't even need batteries! These are spinning tops with interchangeable features that are collectable. They battle in stadiums, which you don't need; just a smooth floor that is willing to get scuffed or a patio or driveway or sidewalk. Have fun out there. I'd say 1st-4th grade is the ideal market here. 

Beyblade Battle Bundle or this Battle Bundle ($50) // Beyblade ($10 ) // Stadium ($9)

Nail Polish Set

Good for a girly girl aged 2 to 92. We all have nails, keep them fresh ladies. My niece's favorite is Hello Kitty OPI in Let's Celebrate, included in this kit. 

Hello Kitty OPI Holiday 2019 Collection (under $20)

A Few Bath/Body Little Luxuries 

Tried out a few products from this goat milk based company and everything was nourishing. I have extremely sensitive skin, nothing bothered it at all. 

Beekman 1802 Gift Set ($21)

Hear me out, this isn't to digest. This won't get you high. It is a skin oil. It has cannabis seed extract, deal with it, and slather it. 

First Aid Beauty Oat & Cannabis Sativa Seed Dry Oil ($30)

A New Cookbook

I follow this blogger/home chef. Everything I've made from her recipes is top notch. She just came out with this cookbook. Real food for real homes. 

Hopes Table: Recipes from a Mennonite Kitchen ($20 hardcover, $11 ebook)

BONUS- I'm linking her blog for you to test out the recipes for yourself- here you are

Ice-chest/Cooler

Do you know anyone who likes to camp? road trip? tailgate? picnic? spends the day on the beach? soccer dad/mom? Diet Coke mama? Who doesn't like an ice cold beverage??? WHO?

Camp Zero 10L Cooler, comes in white, blue, or tan from Costco ($70) *hot tip, or shall I say "cool tip"; you don't have to have a Costco card to shop most items online AND most have low to no shipping charges. You're welcome. 

Sees Chocolates

They taste good. 

Box of See's Chocolate (Around $26 a pound, but lots of sizes/options)

And, as always, if you are going to make a home made gift this year, I offer to you this lovely recipe from another blogger: Peppermint Whoopie Pies. Feel free to adjust to your whims; swap the peppermint out for some candied ginger, or a blood orange squeeze & zest, whatever you're feeling my friends.

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Have a New Year worth having! 

I love you all (in varying degrees). 

P.S. I love that this blog looks like it was designed in the early 2000's. Thank you for noticing, it was. 

Oscars 2019: Academy Awards Best Picture Nominations

In alphabetical order... my opinions. 

Black Panther- Have not seen. 

Blackkklansman- This was the best movie (not my favorite one nominated, though my 2nd). It was just better than the others. It was creative, well written, entertaining, and had a solid message that was relevant when it happened and now. It was over the top Spike-style, but the story itself is over the top so the style worked for it. The acting was good, and not distracting. It explores racism, which is always polarizing and somehow it makes heroes out of the police, which is a complex juxtaposition to what is currently going on with our current racial tensions... I applaud Spike Lee for his master directing and writing. I also decry criticism that this movie takes too many liberties on writing history... it was based off a true events (not a true story), no one is claiming it is a documentary. It was well paced, drew me in, made me think, made me laugh, it did it's job. 

Bohemian Rhapsody- An overly generous homage to the band Queen, and a bit of a weird (read: inaccurate) take on Freddy Mercury, overacted by Rami Malek. He was begging for the Best Actor win the entire time, and it might have worked... because he isn't a bad actor, he was just like "DO YOU SEE ME?!". In addition to that, the entire costume shop & make up artist teams should be ashamed of their work. Overall, this movie was actually poorly made, but people seemed to like it. Even I didn't dislike it... maybe it was the music that tricked everyone into liking it?  

The Favourite- Not my favorite or my favourite. It had so much potential, could have been something, but wasn't nearly witty enough for itself.  Well acted by all. Olivia Coleman should win for best actress. She was capable to do what the movie failed to do: be believably wickedly fun. Emma Stone and Rachel Weisz were also both nominated for Best Supporting Actress, they were just so unpleasant to the point of being unpalatable. There should have been far more winks from this movie, there were none. There should have been more charisma, there was none. 

Green Book- Don't do a movie about rejecting stereotypes by having a stereotype side-kick. Let me tell you: I was never surprised, let alone delighted, by a black man doing the right thing. I was however disappointed, rolling my eyes, at the side-kick character being a New York Italian-American thug who has mafia friends and eats like a beast and has pasta dinners with his loud family. 

Roma-  Confession: I didn't finish watching this beautifully boring movie. It just isn't the best picture of the year. They spent 10+ minutes showing us the undercarriage of a car parking in a tight space. There was a twist; there was a little doggie doo-do that may or may not be ran over by the car. Also, making a movie in black and white is such a cheap novelty; don't try to distract my attention with this eye-catching ploy... it was set in the 70's, when they literally had color film. Next.

A Star is Born- My favorite to watch of the bunch, I wouldn't mind this winning. What carried the movie was beautiful & talented people telling a time-tested story. Lady Gaga did a good job for being not-an-actress, but she wasn't worthy of any nomination herself.  Cooper proved himself as a solid director. He should probably always direct himself as an actor, because it worked. He is nominated for the performance, deserved. The soundtrack also blurred out many flaws. This movie plays like a first album; Bradly's directing and screenwriting debut, Gaga's acting debut. These people might just have a shot in Hollywood, lol. 

Vice- I guess they didn't think a movie called "Lynne" was going to sell... so instead of titling it "Vice Wife" (which totally would have sold, because it's an almost rhyme)… anyway, they made a movie about Lynne Cheney and they sprinkled in scenes of Dick rising to power and making bad choices. It is like if The Big Short was about politics and instead of teaching us about how it all works, they just "teach us" about what a dick Dick Cheney was.



P.S. AMC A-list is the best 

Oscars 2018 Academy Awards Best Picture OpEd

Spoilers: If you are new around here please realize there will be spoilers. So, buckle up as I run down my thoughts on the Best Picture Nominations, I even score them on my own 10 point scale. 

Three Billboards Outside of Ebbing Missouri- This deserves a win for screenplay. It was v interesting. It explored emotions better than any other nom by far. You not only get a story that is smart, you get characters who are carved out of a situation, who by the end, you got to know enough to know who they are no matter the situation. The final scene is so poetic. As a whole, it is heavy and dark, but I didn't mind. They weren't gross about it. The storytelling struck a good balance for me. Oh, also the music/score was number one for a reason. Who says it was number one? I did just now. It was. 8.8 out of 10

Shape of Water- I refuse to watch 2 minutes (let alone 2 hours) of a human woman falling in lust/love with a non-human, made-up, animal-monster-alien. 0/10. 

Lady Bird- Trying, like, so hella hard. I get to be extra judgy of things I know well, we all do. LB is a teen beyond her years in Northern California with a complicated relationship with her Mom, about to graduate High School in 2002. Well, I graduated in 1999; this movie is mostly just annoying. If you are looking for a movie that is like this one, but better, there are several others you can watch. My pick would be "Where the Heart Is" and I can't even stand Natalie Portman, so that says a lot. You can't make a quaint coming-of-age flick anymore because there's nothing quaint about something that has saturated the market for years. Try "Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist", oh oh or "The Way, Way Back", or ffs read Catcher in the Rye (hated that book maybe more than any other I've ever bothered to read). Now, before my haters think or say "Mary, Mary, you're being quite contrary"! I offer you losers this: the movie didn't suck completely, if I had to grade it using a Film Making 101 matrix it would get high marks. The thing is: this movie should be swirling with angst and varied emotions... yet, it's actually stale and vapid. I felt nothing while being mildly entertained. It needed to be raw. Examples... she caught her 1st love making out with a boy: no big deal for Lady Bird or the movie apparently. Make parents refi their home: NBD. Almost fail class and not graduate: NBD. Have to bail on prom date: NBD. And so it went.  Anyway, the most annoying thing of this whole movie is how they never explain why she chooses her dumb self-appointed nickname. The greatest triumph of the film is how they never explain why her brother Miguel is another race. I'm not kidding. It doesn't matter if you assume he was adopted or a child from a previous relationship of either parent. It. Does. Not. Matter. and that's point. 4/10, maybe 5/10 if you are bored. 

The Post- The Snooze. Spielberg has only himself to blame. It's so him. Soft focus on Hanks being a good guy. The script itself isn't bad. The story is fine. I enjoyed that they stayed true to the history and it was so relevant today... but that has more to do with intrinsic truths than it does movie making. What happened was the whole thing got plugged into the Spielberg machine to crank out a blockbuster. Strong leads: check. Relevant political story: check. Progressive outcome: check. If this movie were visual art it would be a print (get it? a print, newspaper, omg). Spielberg is the Thomas Kinkade of filmmaking in so many ways. 7/10

Call Me By Your Name- Want to move to the Italian countryside for a summer? The cast of sophisticated characters charm their way through living their best lives. Comparing it to Lady Bird is easy since they are both centered around a year in the life of a graduating high schooler. However CMBYN is more of a romance and exploration of the human experience more than a coming of age.Take my disrespect for LB, quadruple it, then triple that, now convert it to appreciation and admiration, that is how I feel about CMBYN. It does lean a touch too sexual overall, taking away from the romance of the relationships and the romance of the film in general. That is my only criticism. It was real and beautiful. I learned it was shot in chronological order (v rare) which I believe gave the actors time to acquaint themselves more fully with their characters and with the story. Nuances like that are what takes things from "mildly entertaining" to deeply moving. One of the best monologues in movie history was delivered (Prof. Pearlman to Elio at the end in the library). This movie lets us in in a profound way. I loved it obviously, which is also easy to do.  9.5/10 

Darkest Hour(s)- This was a good movie. 7/10

Dunkirk- This was a bad movie. 2/10

Get Out- Should win. It was the best picture. Brilliant. You might not have gotten it. I say that with all the contempt in the world. If you don't love this movie or realize how many layers of genius is involved here, you might never get it (the movie or life). Like nothing else before it, it transcends genre. Intricately its own thing and it does everything I want a movie to do, told in a way only the magic of movies can. They accomplish all this while being a comedy, drama, horror movie and there is a plot and a twist! Come for the suspense but stay for the social commentary. Jordan Peele, will you marry me? OMG, you guys, while writing this, I just googled and he is married to Chelsea Peretti who I find intelligent, witty, and all-around likeable... she was also born and raised near me, so, she is basically me in a diff body... (I won't get into how funny saying "me in a diff body" was... watch the movie people)... fine, he can stay married to her. Bottom line is this movie is shockingly well made and undeniably fresh, relevant, smart, well acted, well written, captivating, funny, sad, artistic, and has the ability to incite thought enough to provoke change. 10 out of 10. 

Phantom Thread- Yes, thank you. Great movie. From top to bottom, quality... from start to finish about 20 minutes before the finish. I can't wait for the DVD to come out with an alternative ending. Please give us a different ending? And by that I mean I want the movie to end differently and I'd like Daniel Day Lewis to end his acting career differently. He claims this will be his final role. If he wins for best lead actor he will have been the only male with 4 wins. A woman already did this (Katherine Hepburn). Back to the movie... it was humming along nicely before it self-destructed. I thought the living room visiting teaching session with the doctor in flashbacks was a bit choppy, but other than that one tiny flaw, this thing was tight. Costumes being of particular note. Then, the ending came crashing down. Ugh. Lame. Besides the ending, I really like the movie. I didn't like the characters, but I liked the character development. The acting by everyone involved was a master class.  Bravo, bravo. 8/10

P.S. Anyone else wonder why The Promise didn't get nominated? Oh, that's right because there was a literal orchestrated campaign against the film by Armenian Genocide deniers. They flooded online ratings before it was released with down votes, zero scores, etc... and apparently the academy can't think for itself? Wouldn't want to nominate a worthy film because people (seemingly) didn't love it. Eye roll.

I'm Not Wrong- Oscars 2017

Fun Disclosure: I publish this article annually, and inevitably someone will kind of get annoyed/irritated/irate with me and say something like, "WRONG! xyz!" and carry on defending their favorite movie. This blog is my opinion. I am writing it. It is not wrong. It is 100% correct; it is exactly how I think, how I feel. I'm cool with you having your own view about the movies, duh, that is the thing about art, everyone sees it differently. I am not trying to fight you, but probably won't change my mind.


On to the shows (spoilers)...


La La Land- I'm starting with this one because it is heavily favored as the winner. I'd like to think I was the 1st person not to love this movie. There were parts of this thing that I loved. Truly. The parts that I didn't like were so distracting though. Foremost being the backmost (the end)... it's like pick a story to tell already and tell it. The "double-ending" was cheap. It was so everyone could walk away happy. That never works (not with movies, and not with most things.) When you give everyone partial satisfaction, you have no one actually happy. You have two half-happys out there. Moving on, have you ever bought the Crayola 8-pack Classic Colors markers? Apparently so has the director, because this thing was a long-form advert for them. Every single dress, car, building, couch, wall, etc was a saturated primary or secondary color. Until things started going sad, then they were not saturated and there was a lot of black and brown. This is no artistic flare, this is a cheaper gimmick than the double ending. If this trick was a pastry, it would be a store brand twinkie. I guess Hollywood hasn't had a twinkie before. Don't get me wrong, twinkies are good in that cheap gas station treat kind of way. I suppose if you are used to French pastries, when someone finally gives you a twinkie, you'll probably like it. But if you are me and you know what a twinkie is and you expect a warm croissant you'll want to swat the twinkie out of Damien Chazelle's hand. He wrote and directed this, as he did Whiplash. I wish I could mentor him. I really liked the story overall, and I really liked Ryan's performance. The music was on point. Even the way the song n' dance was seamless and not clunky at all. A hard feat.


Now the movies in order of my top favorite to shouldn't-even-be-here:


Lion- This was my favorite of the nominees. Overall, it was the best done. It told a universal story in a way that was: gripping, emotion-evoking, suspenseful, intriguing, caring, thoughtful, and entertaining. It was well acted from start to finish. It was well edited. The characters were on-point. Will watch again. Will think about again. Will recommend.


Arrival- You know I don't even believe in aliens. And Amy Adams generally bugs. Sci-fi is not my genre either. All that against this, and I loved it. That speaks volumes*, since this was my second favorite film of the group. The aliens in this story are actually literal, but think of them as metaphorical. This was the best story told on screen in 2016. It is an adapted screenplay, based off novella. This movie was a slow burn for me. While watching it, it was a little hard to cut through the noise of sci-fi and get down to business with what it was telling the audience (me). Once that happened and it finally got around to it, I was like "yes, yes yes" (the second half is 50000x better than the set-up of the first half). Not only did I love the story and what it was about, I appreciated the way the let me discover things right along side the characters, since they were learning too.
 *"Speaks volumes" was a fun little word-play since the whole crux of the thing is these aliens who don't speak nor communicate in a language humans know.


Hell or High Water- damn entertaining movie. I loved the characters, even though each was a villain in their own way. Jeff Bridges should (won't) win for best supporting actor. He nailed it. In fact, everyone who showed up on the screen did a fine job, down to the waitress who had minimal screen time. This is like a modern day western, so creative and so well done. I didn't want it to end.


Moonlight-  It did a good job telling the story of a man who had a hard life. It is the kind of movie that makes you wonder about strangers on the streets and what their story is. Manchester by the Sea just the same. They are quite similar in that regard. In a lot of regards actually. In comparing them though, I liked that Moonlight seemed more confidant in what it was. It told the story. It shared the life. Manchester had some things that were a bit bombastic in comparison. Anyway, back to Moonlight. It was the most relevant in today's culture and climate. It may not be studied in film school in 100 years, but I bet will be studied in American studies and Humanity classes. The main character of Moonlight was played by three different actors, and it was done phenomenally. He barely spoke, dialog was rare, and yet they each were able to really convey what he was all about, how he became who he was. I also thought there was value in this movie sharing a sub-culture with the viewers. I mean, one of the films hero was a mid level drug distributer. This story though is one of personal growth, pride, self acceptance, forgiveness and a giant dose of reality. Some lives are well lived even if illegal and in the throws of sadness. It is a hard watch, but worthy of watching. The cinematography is armature hour (was nominated, what?!)


Manchester by the Sea- Another film focusing on characters. It focuses on grief and familial bonds. It is a hard watch mostly, and for the most part a well crafted film. Though, there were some huge pitfalls that marred the movie for me. There was so much b-roll footage. Like I am talking at least 45 minutes of us watching out the window of the truck as Lee drives around Manchester. It added nothing. I get it was trying to pace itself, but at a certain point watching the movie I could tell you how many branches were on that one tree by road near the pier. Anyway, another thing I really did not like is that we were supposed to be exploring the grief of losing Joe (father to Patrick, brother to Lee, all around good guy). As we are watching this all of the sudden we learn of a more sensational, more devastating loss of Lee's children. Which I get it, grief can not be prescribed and comes in all doses. But come on, this is a fictional story and it was like "oh, I've got this good sad story, MORE SAD" - it was a bit full of itself and distracting at that point. That said, Casey Affleck should win Best Actor. And I wouldn't even be upset if Lucus Hedges does for supporting too.


Hacksaw Ridge- OMG. War movies should stop being made. Was Doss a hero? Yeah, he is real and really saved so many people and really stood up for what he believed in. Does his story deserve to be told? Yes. Am I one to shut down the first amendment? No. Do I blame Mel Gibson for somehow glorifying war? Yeah. And side rant- guys, war is so dumb. SO DUMB. I'm anti-war. Ok, back to the movie, no need to watch an hour of cinematic blow-em-up any more. It is not provocative. Any educated person understands how horrific battle is. There is no graphic image that will make me understand more, so what is the point anymore. I know the director is trying to get us to feel like we are there, to understand the conditions, to be immersed in the horror. But, when it is done we are still eating snacks sitting in our safe couch in our free land (because of the warriors, I get it). Anyway, stop making war movies with long battle scenes. Also, should Andrew Garfield even be nominated for best actor? No,not even close. He did not do a good job acting. He was over acting. Mel Gibson also does not deserve best director.


Hidden Figures- Shouldn't have been nominated. The story is worthy of a telling. But, it is such a bubble-gum, Barbie-doll situation. So surface. Almost offensive. The whole point is to share this story of black women working for NASA in the 60s. True pioneers. Breaking down stereo types by living their lives... and then Disney gets ahold of this and literally shows me a southern black church picnic scene with about every stereo type you could imagine in the span of 10 minutes (Sassy black mother hen telling a child to eat their greens as they pick up fried chicken, sigh). Also, we didn't need to watch Cookie Lion run to the bathroom 10 times. Segregated bathrooms were not only unfair, unequal and ridiculous, but they were a true barrier to this woman's work, yes, ok, fine, now in a well-made movie they'd be able to show us that with out literally annoying the audience with unrealistic depictions of  these bathroom runs. Get a grip Disney, the problems Katherine Johnson faced were far deeper than not being able to afford a pretty pearl necklace (even if because of income inequality).


Fences- Did not see.


Additional notes:


a.) The Lobster should win for original screenplay. It was so original. La La Land was also nominated for it, and should not win but might because people forget musicals have been around for ever, stop acting like it was so daring by being a musical.


b.) The Infiltrator and The Light Between the Oceans were totally deserving and got nothing. Not necessarily in need for Best Picture, but acting and even some sub-categories like cinematography and costume design were totally glaring omissions.

Christmas Gift Guide 2016

2016: dreadful year, brilliant Christmas.

Let's get right into this guide, shall we?
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NASA vintage posters. Here is the deal, you download and print. So basically these are "free" if you have a printer that can handle it. Or a few bucks at your local Kinkos (which are now called FedEx Office if you are trying to find one for real).

 

 

Download these and many more options here: Visions of The Future NASA Posters

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Speaking of posters and exploring... I firmly believe the National Parks are a gift to America. 

An  Annual Pass that provides access to more than 2,000 recreation areas managed by five Federal agencies, with up to 100% of the proceeds being used to improve and enhance visitor recreation services. Anyone 16 years or older may purchase the pass; children under 16 are always admitted free. Each Annual Pass can have up to two "owners". Now warning: DO NOT buy this for someone aged 62 or older. They can get a lifelong pass for $10 on their own.

$80 America The Beautiful - Annual National Park Pass

Bonus: the worst site in the world, maybe not updated since the 1990s, run by our fine government of course, sells some pretty nice posters - including one of a National Park map and various Dept. of Interior promo posters, from like $5 to $20. Government Bookstore - Posters & Prints
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Another far out gift for gals is changing color lipstick. It is one color in the tube, but is another (pink) on the lips.



Find these with free shipping, $25 at Nordstrom: Lipstick Queen Hello Sailor Blue Lipstick or Lipstick Queen Frog Prince Color Changing Lipstick (Green)

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Everyone out there is in love with Ina Garten. Me too. She has a new cookbook out, Cooking for Jeffery, and while it makes a great gift that many will love, it is the go-to cookbook gift of 2016.

You know what one I can pretty much assure you won't find a duplicate under the tree?This cookbook by Chrissy Teigen. Yes, that Chrissy. The model, married to John Legend, who has a wild wardrobe and a wild twitter account. She has an actual good cookbook. Now, I have flipped through and I wouldn't suggest it for a conservative family member. I will give a visual example below... but if you know someone who can handle the heat, get them in the kitchen with this one.

Hardcover, $18 or Digital on Kindle for $16 at Amazon: Cravings: Recipes for All the Food You Want to Eat


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For those who like to eat, but don't like to cook... there is this tiny book of cooks will take you all over the world.

From Amazon, $20: Where To Eat Pizza

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Got a green thumb in your fam? Or a black thumb? Or a red, white, blue, yellow, purple, pink thumb?

Seed bombs are the bomb. You toss and grow. Wildflowers, herbs, or edible flowers.

Packs from $9 & up from Seedles: Grow The Rainbow Seed Bombs

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Speaking of the garden... A life-long reader of mine, Gwen, told me the other day she was a butterfly. I asked her how she knew she wasn't a moth. Argument ensued.

Look how cute this art kit is?

$17 from Amazon online Butterfly Color Kit

$20 in store at Papyrus Papyrus to check for in store stock

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Another kid gift are these kids sized headphones. I can't stand be assaulted with noise, and I can't imagine having some kid around with some device with some annoying game ping, or background music, or even having to watch AND listen to the same Disney movie a million times over. Enter these earphones.

$49 for Bluetooth from Amazon Untangled Kids Bluetooth Headphones
$22 for certain colors of the wired version from Target Wired Kids Headphones

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Now, the next two you can give as a set, or break it up. Both from Target, I have both. I love both. They are both quite affordable, but well made. For someone who entertains, or just likes nice things in their kitchen. These pictures really don't do either the justice they deserve.

Pitcher, $13 from Target Libbey Impressions Glass Pitcher

Serving Board, $20 from Target Marble and Wood Board

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And, finally, to end the list as always, please give the gift of baked goods.

Shortbread: hard to mess up, hard to stop eating. Recipe found here: Salted Chocolate Shortbread Cookies

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PS- bonus life pro tip: don't vape. It is super gross.

Nominees

I watched most. I won't watch a few. Who was excited that Joy wasn't nominated? I was too. On to the ones who were nominated...

THE BIG SHORT:
This movie was well executed, as we watched characters find a sliver of "success" amidst the housing market crash of 2008 the international recession and utter dismantling of banking worldwide. This movie took a raw, complex, thorny event and made it digestible, though a style of filmmaking could be a bit condescending at times and pandered to this superiority complex that the filmmaker had, but then again many of then men in the story have the same issue. I almost appreciated the accidental mirroring of the movie talking to the audience as if we were idiots and the bankers trying to explain their discoveries to others as if they were the same. This movie had another thing going for it: Big names. 

BRIDGE OF SPIES: 
Underrated and long as hell. While wondering if the movie would ever end, I really did enjoy it. It was interesting and emotional. It told a story worth telling and did it in a way that only a movie can. 

BROOKLYN:
It was cute. 

MAD MAX: 
Won't see. It's too much. 

THE MARTIAN:
Longer than Bridge of Spies by three minutes, but it felt like three years longer. Casting was on point. Obviously Matt Damon was able to pull it off, and he did with humor and grit and grace. Supporting characters also fared well. Deserves the nomination, doesn't deserve a win. As everyone has noted: it is Castaway in space. Had Castaway not been made yet, I'd like this more (and I don't even like Castaway and I liked The Martian) but the magic of a single-man-isolation-show was lost (on Mars). 

THE REVENANT:
Didn't see. Afraid it will be too violent, but I think we can all agree that Leo deserves Best Actor- and hopefully he will win for this, but really we know he is winning for What's Eating Gilbert Grape and they just are getting around to giving him his due finally in 2016. 

ROOM: 
Gah. This was a good one. An excellent one. It was tourmenting and dark and funny and sad and happy. All the emotions. It was also well done; well timed, well balanced, and overall impressed me. It impressed me with the acting most of all. Though it is a "composite" of various captives/victims I did have a pang of guilt for using such tragic stories as my entertainment. I mean, how absurd is it that people are making movies and "enjoying" them. Though, it was eye opening and educational and I can't imagine anyone "enjoying" watching this movie, though it is still a movie. A full length one at that. Sometimes I save short films to explore and expose topics in a shorter format that seems almost more respectful.  It was more complex than any other nominated film this year. It took bigger risks and therefore it had bigger returns. 

SPOTLIGHT:
It also was a topic that is so sad and draining, at every turn I was more and more upset... but they made a good movie with the story. It was over acted (Mark Ruffalo) and it was a bit ridiculous with the costumes (Rachel McAdams pants). There were flaws. It might win, and I don't think it deserves it. 


What should win: Room

What could win (no primaries, split top votes, 2nd or 3rd then default wins): The Big Short, Bridge of Spies, The Revenant 

What shouldn't win: Spotlight, The Martian, Brooklyn, Mad Max

WHAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN NOMINATED: Sicarco. It was my personal favorite movie of 2015. It did get some technical noms and I am over here, like, "the sum of the parts?". It really was good. It was a good movie. A good story. Good acting. Wasn't into itself. Made me think, really think. And didn't rest it's laurels on some hot topic or some hot story from the past. It was it's own.